/15/2013

Well,I knew this was going to happen. Who I have turned into because of it?I don't know....I caught feelings and it was awful. He definitively does not like me,he never did. I have cried over him and thought bad stuff about him and did a horrible thing. We slept together again and he went completely flat on me...Do you know how that made me feel? Like something was wrong with me,like I couldn't be desired as a woman. It made me feel like straight up shit.... Then a guy comes along,someone I barely know and he is nice and I feel nothing for this guy. We sleep together and ya know what? I learned alot from him. He KISSED me,TOUCHED me. He made me feel wanted,like I was something sexy. I NEEDED that. I wanted that. Even if the story behind him wasn't the best one and I will never sleep with him again,he made me realize I deserve BETTER then what I have been settling for. That ONE night of passion,that one night I was wanted for all that I was,even if it was fleeting,Is what I deserve. I deserve someone to touch me like that EVERY night. I deserve better then J. I am worth so much more. So I AM getting over him. I will not be a fool. I will not get my heart broken by someone who doesn't deserve my heart to begin with.